Humorous Tyke Moments
JACK (age 3) was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby sister. After
a while he asked: ‘Mom why have you got two? Is one for hot and one for cold
milk?’
MELANIE (age 5) asked her Granny how old she was. Granny replied she was so
old she didn’t remember any more. Melanie said, ‘If you don’t remember you
must look in the back of your panties. Mine say five to six ‘
STEVEN (age 3) hugged and kissed his Mom good night. ‘I love you so much
that when you die I’m going to bury you outside my bedroom window.’
BRITTANY (age 4) had an earache and wanted a pain killer. She tried in vain
to take the lid off the bottle. Seeing her frustration, her Mom explained it
was a child-proof cap and she’d have to open it for her. Eyes wide with
wonder, the little girl asked: ‘How does it know it’s me?’
SUSAN(age 4) was drinking juice when she got the hiccups. ‘Please don’t give
me this juice again,’ she said, ‘It makes my teeth cough.’
DJ (age 4) stepped onto the bathroom scale and asked: ‘How much do I cost?’
MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young couple that were hugging and kissing
in a restaurant. Without taking his eyes off them, he asked his dad: ‘Why is
he whispering in her mouth?’
CLINTON(age 5) was in his bedroom looking worried. When his Mom asked what
was troubling him, he replied, ‘I don’t know what’ll happen with this bed
when I get married. How will my wife fit in?’
JAMES(age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His dad read: ‘The man named
Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city but his wife looked
back and was turned to salt.’ Concerned, James asked: ‘What happened to the
flea?’
TAMMY(age 4) was with her mother when they met an elderly, rather wrinkled
woman her Mom knew. Tammy looked at her for a while and then asked, ‘Why
doesn’t your skin fit your face?’
The Sermon I think this Mom will never forget…. this particular Sunday
sermon… ‘Dear Lord,’ the minister began, with arms extended toward heaven
and a rapturous look on his upturned face. ‘Without you, we are but dust…’
He would have continued but at that moment my very obedient daughter who was
listening leaned over to me and asked quite audibly in her shrill little
four year old girl voice, ‘Mom, what is butt dust?’
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As my five-year-old son and I were headed to McDonald’s one
day, we passed a car accident. Usually when we see something
terrible like that, we say a prayer for those who might be
hurt, so I pointed and said to my son, “We should pray.”
From the back seat I heard his earnest request: “Please,
God, don’t let those cars block the entrance to McDonald’s.”
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